Musings of my mind - II

There are some things that I observe around me and which have quite an impact on me, and I believe most of you reading this might agree with me. 

One: 

Everyone in this world need some kind of motivation / appreciation / recognition for their efforts, just like how we expect recognition for our efforts in work / office. Unless such appreciation or recognition keep coming, people are bound to get frustrated and annoyed quite often. This applies to families as well. 

I feel, we generally take family for granted for things that are being done for us. If somebody in our family does something for us, how often have we taken time to appreciate it? Almost never right? Why do we deny them that? What do we lose in spending a few minutes to let them know what their work means to you? If not daily, atleast once in a while, we can surely do this. It'd instantly make them happy and also make them feel important. 

For example, when someone takes an effort to cook something new, even though it's not something you like, or that it didn't taste the way you like, before you comment on how it is, please take a moment to appreciate the effort they put in. That'd instantly boost them up. Later on, you can let them know what you didn't like. Also, the key is in the way you communicate it to them. I'd recommend putting it out as an improvement point, rather than an outright negative comment. Eg. You could use phrases like, "so-and-so could have been better", instead of an outright "I don't like it". This will surely create a positive impact on the recipient. 

Two:

The world is filled with people who are so different from each other. Each one has a certain way of doing things, and most often it may not be the same way that you'd do it or like it to be done. The end results, however, are going to be the same. 

When we need a work to be done by someone, why are we so persistent that it has to be done the way we do it? Once we delegate a work to somebody, we keep making corrections to their approach to the extent that drives the other person to think why they agreed to do that work in the first place, and the next time they wouldn't bother asking if they could help you and you'd be left doing all the work yourself. Further, you also lose the right to constantly tell that all the work is done only by you and nobody is helping out. Help was offered, but you were only too stubborn to accept it the way it came. 

So, whenever you need help, ask for it and mention the key things to be done or the result you need. Learn not to micro manage and accept the work as it gets done. This way the person delegating can relax and the person who does the work would also feel good that they were able contribute something in the chores. 

Have any of you faced these situations? If so, do let me know your suggestions on how else these things can be handled in a better way.

4 months!

Dear Athiyan,

You've got through 123 days of life on this planet and I truly hope you're enjoying it.

The fourth month has gone by pretty fast. We've made the shift from my parents home to V's home. I was really surprised at the way you took to this change. You hardly batted an eye. You took to the change like a fish to water.  You were brought here in your sleep. You woke up once, nursed and slept. And finally after 5 hours when you woke up, you started playing as if nothing had happened.

While your maternal grandparents are still struggling to cope with the emptiness there with your departure, you're busy keeping your paternal grandparents here on their toes all the time. And what more, they're always ready to oblige to you. 

Gone are the days of your mindless self-entertainment, now you demand attention. When you're put in the bed and there's no one looking at or playing with you, you become quite restless and start grunting. You only stop when somebody comes over and does some antics and you instantly smile. And that smile slowly changes into a desperate request for them to lift and hold you. 

You've grown a lot and you no longer fit into your dad's arms. Also, you keep placing your foot on anything that gives you a grip (like people's arms, legs or the walls) and leap upward. Your head has set and you love turning it around and looking at everything when somebody holds you up. With a very bright yellow-orange dancing duck, your grandma has finally managed to make you turn your head to the right. Still, left is your first preference, but slowly and steadily you do turn to right once in while, or when somebody tries to interact with you. 

Your love for lights has only increased more. You spend most of your evenings interacting (aka making random noises and laughing) with the various colored lights in the ceiling and the light in the fish tank. 

You enjoy bathing, and absolutely love it when you are poured water. Right at the end of fifth minute out of the bath, you demand to be put to sleep, leaving us with very little time to dress you up.

You seem to like only rough-and-tough games where you're literally being squeezed out. The way you laugh when V does a lift-and-freefall can vouch for how much you enjoy it. As much as V loves doing it, you love being the recipient of it. But along with that hysterical laugh comes a ton of drool. You're a drool factory currently. If the drool doesn't automatically come out of your mouth, you deliberately put your hands / fingers into your mouth and take out another ton of drool. Half the day is spent wiping out your drooling face. 

Making you sleep has become a herculean task these days and most often is preceded by full-on crying and pulling of your hair. You've a certain way for sleeping with each person and refuse to sleep otherwise. Like, if your paati is making you sleep, she has to put you on her lap and rock. If it's me, I'll either have to put you up on my shoulders or in my legs. If either of us change our usual ways, you get visibly irritated. Whosoever tries to make you sleep, this song should invariably run in the background. 

Our best bonding time is while you feed. Though you've become quite playful, the way you flash your toothless smile once your stomach is full is priceless. That is something I shall forever cherish. 

Your whole world revolves around 3 rooms and occasionally the terrace.  With the Corona pandemic and lockdowns everywhere, we were unable to take you out anywhere. Hope we'll go more places, (if not more, atleast to the beach) once things settle down.

Love, 

Amma